Organic Rainbow Moment: RULER Skills by Marc Brackett; Permission to Feel
Recognizing: We pick up on our own emotions by paying attention to our thinking, our physiology, and how our body feels and by paying attention to other people’s facial expressions, body language, vocal tone, and behavior.
Understanding: I may see that your face looks worried, but I have no idea why you’re worried, or I may misperceive how you’re feeling (which happens very often). So the U is saying, “Let’s get deeper. Let’s get at the cause. What might be the reason for that feeling?”
Labeling: This is where we can ask ourselves questions like: I feel angry, but am I enraged? Am I livid? Or am I feeling annoyed, peeved, or frustrated? This allows us to get at the granularity of the emotion.
Expressing: How we express our feelings varies as a function of context. If you’re in a workplace that says, “Emotions don’t matter here,” you’re going to learn very quickly to suppress.
Regulation: What are the strategies I can use to keep or shift how I’m feeling? For example, if I’m having a bad day, what are the strategies I can implement to shift how I’m feeling if my emotions are not aligned with what I am trying to accomplish?
Marc Brackett; Permission to Feel